I read many blogs, and their assorted links- and am awed by the wisdom that they convey and at the multitude of responses that they generate. Everyone has a story, an opinion, and a strong sense of their own personal ‘rightness’. I feel very alone in the universe by comparison (as if I have any right to compare!). Perhaps once you reach a certain age, nothing you have to say is exciting or relevant. And my sense of rightness is shaky, and too often driven by fear. There is no community out there that consistently dialogues with me, or me with them, and more often than not, I am left to the solitude of my own thoughts. C’est la vie. I wish that I could enter into the conversations with confidence, and not be stuck with the monologue spinning around in my head. I try very hard not to talk around certain people for fear of being perceived as dominating or attracting attention (unintentionally). Always appearances. How silly to be intimidated so by feelings of cyber-rejection. Oh well….God forbid that I should sound ‘tragic’ and get frozen into some maudlin stereotype. Actually..I should be able to spill forth with abandonment, fountains of words, woven into story and song- because there is no one there to witness it. But there is no inspiration. The voice is silent. I know that You, God, are out there listening, but sometimes it is nice to have the deep connections that are the fruit of trusting, honest, loving human relationships. In the meantime, perhaps I will keep reading, and posting the occasional (hopefully encouraging) comment. If I don’t get feedback, I can at least give it. In this I have a choice.