We live our lives in a context of personal history. Our past informs and shapes our present, and that in turn forms the trajectory that becomes our future. If we are not proactive and mindful of our unique collection of broken experiences, then like a rudderless boat we will be tossed and sucked downstream by the currents and winds of familiarity. We slip into the groove of what is known- be those interactions healthy or dysfunctional. I have often lived life in a reactive mode- bouncing off walls of my own creation. Fortresses that were meant to keep the evil of the world out, but which became prisons instead, locking out the beauty in all that was wild. I have always found intimacy to be a terrifying venture. Blame it on primal abandonment issues.